Embracing Self-Care in the New Year: Why Setting Intentions is More Effective than Resolutions
The post advocates for setting flexible, heart-centered intentions over rigid New Year's resolutions, emphasizing self-growth and acceptance.
Do you feel pressure to set New Year's resolutions each year?
If you said yes, you aren't alone. Where I live, in the US, it seems almost like a sacred tradition for people to have a resolution set in stone by 11:59 PM on December 31st. It can feel overwhelming, and the pressure can be exacerbated by virtually every business around trying to sell you something to "help" you with your resolution. The diet and wellness industries in particular can be the biggest perpetrators of this type of marketing. You may be seeing companies selling fitness or health products with the tag line of "New Year, New You!" It's everywhere. It can be so tough to weed through all of those things. And you may even feel guilty for not having a desire to become a "new" you.
This past year, 2021, I noticed a new trend popping up amongst social media influencers, and even some fitness or health companies, in their New Year's messaging. This new trend I have noticed is encouraging people to ditch New Year's resolutions and, instead, set intentions for the New Year. Personally, I feel that this is a step in the right direction. Although, I do believe that it is perfectly okay to not have an intention set for the New Year. It's not a requirement. You are your own person, and you have the autonomy to do whatever feels best to you. Having been in a global pandemic for the past two years, it's 100% okay to simply let yourself be. However, if you are interested in learning what intentions are and how they can be an alternative to resolutions, keep reading.
So, what is an intention and how is it different than a resolution?
At first, you may think that setting an intention seems no different than choosing a resolution. I will break down the definitions of each word, and how I differentiate them. I will also explain the significance of setting intentions in a yoga practice.
Based on a quick Google search, Resolution is defined as "a firm decision to do or not to do something."
"Intention" is defined as "a thing intended; an aim or plan."
As you can see, these words are very similar, but if you read between the lines, you can find the subtle difference. The main thing that comes up for me when reading these definitions is that resolution seems very rigid, and intention sounds more flexible. Therein lies the appeal of setting an intention for New Year's, rather than a resolution. If you reflect on the resolutions people make for New Years, they are usually very firm and give a sense of "do or die" and/or "no pain, no gain" mentalities. Think about how a lot of New Year's resolutions focus around health or fitness. People often say, "My resolution is to lose X pounds" or "I will work out every day without exception". Maybe people make a resolution to start a program like Whole 30 or do a "challenge" like 75 Hard. Personally, I do not endorse either of those things. If you noticed, resolutions also seem to have a set end point. So what happens after you finish an exercise challenge? Do you just say "Well, I did my challenge for the year. I'm all good. I'll make a resolution to do another next year!" And what happens if you "fail" at your resolution? Often, you become resigned and feel like you are a failure.
Here's my take: You didn't fail your resolution. The resolution failed you.
In our culture, we are bombarded with programs, challenges, and products meant to "improve" or "fix" ourselves. This means that you are likely setting a resolution around what is "wrong" with you. Therefore, if you cannot follow through with the resolution in the time you intended, or with the result you intended, you believe you are a failure. And come December, you'll be bombarded with all the same advertising telling you that you need to try again at "transformation". New Year's resolutions also tend to be about taking something away, or restricting something in your life. For example, someone might have a resolution to "cut out sugar" or "stop eating processed foods". These goals are often not sustainable because they are rigid and restrictive. Guilt and negativity are not great motivators.
Setting intention, in my opinion, is a more positive way to look at creating change. This process focuses more on what you can add to your life, and doesn't imply that you need to change who you are. It's about having flexible goals that enrich your life, instead of punishing yourself. In yoga, an intention is referred to in Sanskrit as "Sankalpa". If you have taken yoga classes before, you may have heard the teacher say at the beginning of class: "Perhaps you would like to set an intention". But what does this mean, and how to you do it?
Setting Intentions from the Heart and Mind
When I teach yoga students about setting intention, I encourage them to visualize a seed being planted in their heart and mind. Usually, I encourage students to start by mentally repeated a short "I am" statement to themselves. This can be literally anything you want it to be. For example, "I am safe", "I am whole", "I am loved", etc. You may be thinking that those are just statements and not intentions, but the thing to keep in mind here is that you are planting a seed to help yourself grow. You could also choose a word that has meaning to you as your sankalpa, i.e., peace, confidence, rest. As you can see, this process is broad, and not rigid. As you go through life, you can come back to your affirmation and notice how it impacts your goals and decisions. And this statement can help shape how you set goals.
Let's take it back to the example of weight loss as a New Year's resolution, from my personal experience. At one point, my resolution was to gain muscle without gaining any body fat. It was an arbitrary goal based on changing an aspect of my physical self. At first, I believed that I had good intentions for that goal. I believed it would make me healthier. But when I examined that resolution, I realized that my intention behind it was based on insecurity. It was based on believing I could only be worthy if I was in a lean, athletic looking body. It wasn't actually about honoring my health. So as you can see, the resolution was only the surface action, but the intention was rooted much deeper.
Quick disclaimer: I realize that the decision to pursue weight loss/muscle gain, etc. is a very personal decision. I am not a registered dietitian or medical professional, and therefore I cannot give advice on health or nutrition topics. The above example is simply my own personal experience used as an example.
You can read more of my personal journey with health, but the moral of my story is that resolutions based on what I lacked never worked. Together with my dietitian and my therapist, I learned to accept my body. You could say that my sankalpa statement became "I am worthy as I am". Eventually, my intention behind the choices I made in moving my body and the food I ate became about honoring my body as wonderfully made and worthy of love. Planting that seed in my heart and mind has helped me grow and set sustainable goals, rather than punishing myself with resolutions that I cannot keep.
I will encourage you that setting intentions is not a once a year, one and done process. I encourage you to view your intention as something that can grow with you. It is flexible. Give yourself grace and be patient. And if picking a word or and "I am" statement seems overwhelming, know you don't have to have one. This post is not meant to tell people that they should replace setting a resolution with an intention for the year. I simply want to share the differences between the two and how you can pursue setting intentions if that is your desire.
Practical Steps for Setting Intentions
- Take the pressure off! Give yourself permission to let go of the New Year's resolution mentality without instantly feeling the need to set an intention or pick a word for the year. As I mentioned above, setting an intention at the start of the year is not some universal requirement for life. You can simply let yourself be, without pressure.
- If/When you're ready, take time to reflect. If you feel that you want to set an intention, I encourage you to take time to reflect. Perhaps you spend time in meditation or prayer. If you like to write out your thoughts, get a journal. Perhaps make a list of your personal values or things that are important to you.
- Choose a word or statement. Remember, this can be anything you want it to be.
- Plant the seed. Reflect on why you chose the statement or word that you did. Explore if there are areas of life in which you would like to grow. Use your intention to guide you in any goals you may set, and be flexible, knowing you can always make adjustments or changes.
Here's an example: Perhaps you reflect and determine that taking care of your physical health is important to you. Your intention statement might be: "I choose to honor my body with nourishment, rest, and joyful movement."
Here is another example using a single word. Say you choose the word "rest". An intention based on that word could "I give myself permission to rest."
I hope this post has been helpful. If you have picked a word or intention for the year, feel free to share in the comments. I wish you all peace and rest in this New Year.
With Light and Love,
Julia
Disclaimer: Embrace Joy Yoga (Julia Townsend) is not liable for any bodily injury or property damage incurred by persons using this yoga instruction video. Use this video at your own risk. Consult with your medical provider before engaging in yoga for physical activity.